Can I cry?

Though miles may lie between us we are never far apart,
for friendship doesn't count miles its measured by the heart.


If one day, IF, one day, I am to be going to a far far away place,
will you, my best friends be there for me?


Will you be there, at there, for me?


Or will you be there, at the last day before the day I was going to leave?


Perhaps...You won't.


Perhaps... You wouldn't.


Perhaps... I was being set to be alone. Forever.


If I leave, will I leave maybe a drop of tears behind?


If I leave, will you be there to wave goodbye to me?


If I leave, will you be there to hold my hands and tell me to not go?


Will... You?


I wish.


I wished.


I wished many many times to not go away from here but, the decision is not to me to make.
Sorry.


I have to sacrifice my old friendship to hug my dreams.
Although I will have some new friendships.
But, what I want is you.
My BFFs.
What I want is you.


I couldn't tell you what type of rope is connecting us but I could tell why I can't leave you so easily.


Yes indeed.
Because I gave up my heart to connect to you. My BFFs.
I can't take it back so cruelly.
I'm too soft to be mean.
Although I look so mean.
Meanie. Is what I always being called.
I sounds mean.
This is just to hid something behind.
You wouldn't know.
I wouldn't tell you.
Why?
I'm cruel.
Don't you know?


After this April or June or December, 
Goodbye will be my favourite word to say.


Sorry guys.
Selangor Age Group.
My last presents in Selangor.
PraKL.
My new best friend.
KL.
My new state to present.


New present.
New life.
New club to train.
New place to get to it.
New friends.
New pool to swim in.
New ways to train.
New coach.
New program.
New time.
New training time.
Everything. New.


I'm still not ready to say goodbye.
I cried for some days already.
To leave my BFFs.
And.
To leave the one I like.
Like? Love?
Like.
He haven't yet tell me anything.
Although I didn't tell him that I like him.
Perhaps someone told him already.
And he hasn't getting ready.
He need time.
Too young.
Not mature yet.
Need time to be mature.
Need time to accept.


Yes. I admit that.
I like him.
I love him.
What he knows is to hurt my heart.
Sometimes.
Like sharpish arrows.
Maybe he hasn't mature yet.
Still likes to play fun of me.
Awwwww.
Just can't stop liking him.
I hope that I know who is in his heart...
If only I know...
If only...